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lucky charms, you inspire me...no, really, i'm serious

oh lucky charms...why didn't you tell me this EARLIER?!  the solution to my many logistical problems...sitting right there, under my nose the whole time, at general mills, in the think tank office of none other than lucky himself...  ;-)  TELEPORTING

let go of the fact that i am currently eating probably the most sugary cereal ever created, and let's just focus on this teleporting thing...lucky looks pretty pumped to be doing it, but i can whole heartedly say i would be twice as excited if i could pull this off.  of course, my natural fear of maybe a fly or bug of some sort teleporting with me, and finding a fly hair growing on my body afterwards...that's still there...but, excitement would probably dominate the scene...

how many times this would have come in handy!  as of late, i would most DEFINITELY be teleporting to norway...like regularly.  wake up in norway, teleport to work in chicago...lunch?  maybe meet in australia?  sounds great to me :-)

it really would be amazing.  general mills needs to give up the goods

all joking aside, the idea of teleporting has been something i've repeatedly come back to probably since college when i moved to colorado.  being across the country from everything i had ever known as a home, teleporting home would have pretty much rocked.  not only would it have been cheaper, and, of course, COOLER, than a long flight, but it also would have been so wonderful to see my family simply whenever i had the urge.

since i left michigan at 18 years old, i've lived in many places.  i lived in rhode island, australia, boulder, vail, denver, and chicago.  and i travelled a lot; i went to europe backpacking, to greece, to australia, new zealand, fiji, norway, thailand, and cambodia.  i met people all around the country and all over the world.  and my idea of "home" changed a lot.  at some point during all of this exploring, suddenly michigan didn't really feel like "home" anymore, and i found my heart pulled all around the country and world, to places inhabited by my loved ones thousands of miles from each other.

home is an interesting concept.  the statement "home is where the heart is" might seem cheesy, but it is so accurate.  my "home" was created by my parents until i left home...and then, as i stepped out into my individual path, i began creating my own home.  one experience at a time, my heart created my home.  

the evolution of my sense of home, or the pull of my heart, could probably be charted with my obsession with teleporting.  yes, i know this is ridiculous, and sounds just completely silly, but stay with me here.  in college i wanted to teleport to michigan until i fell in love with drew, then i wanted to teleport to san francisco.  then i went to australia, and i can't even tell you how many times i wanted to teleport back there after returning.  i fell in love with my roommates and friends from australia, and wanted to teleport to new york, wisconsin, boston, norway to see them again.  my heart was all over the place...and any feeling of a stable "home" didn't really exist for most of this time in my life.  

when i first left colorado for chicago, i missed it SO MUCH.  i had lived in colorado for 6 years on my own and had been in one relationship my entire time there, and as i left it, my heart felt like it was literally being ripped out of my chest.  i felt homeless more than i ever had before...god, looking back on that, i can almost feel it again.  i cried on and off for the entire 2 day 18 hour drive, and, upon arriving, ran right into the bathroom of my new apartment, and cried on the toilet for about 30 minutes before emerging to help my parents bring in my boxes...about 4 days later, i also took out a runner while biking on the lake path in a sullen daze...maybe i thought i could teleport back to colorado if i biked fast enough...??

chicago is an amazing city.  and, interestingly, it's the first place i have actually called my home since leaving michigan almost 10 years ago.  at first, i couldn't really place it, but i felt strangely "grounded" here.  after getting over my initial moving shock, i actually stopped thinking about teleporting when i moved here.  don't get me wrong, i still would've LOVED to partake had someone finally invented it, but it didn't seem as needed.  i thought maybe it was the city...the lake...? the festivals...? the proximity to my family...? my career...?  but none of those really seemed to resonate...what WAS IT?

it wasn't until i truly began considering leaving this city, that i really thoroughly explored this feeling.  and i realized it actually is just the exact same concept as what i experienced through my travels; home is where the heart is.

the last 3 years of my life has been completely expansive for me, specifically in my inner world.  my heart has grown in ways i never knew were even possible.  i entered into myself and actually saw my spirit, and i CREATED my heart's desires in my physical life...and it just so happened that this evolution did not occur for me in any of my earlier residences...it occurred for me while living in chicago.

why is chicago my home?  because i manifested my spirit here.  how cool is that?!

sure, the lake is awesome, and i love the music, the festivals, my family, my work...but those things don't make this home.  I MAKE this home.

so, teleporting...still ROCKS.  and maybe even more so now that i understand that the beauty of love in my life from people around the country and world has expanded my concept of home beyond any city lines, physical space, or limited geography.   my home goes with me when i seek out those loves :-)  i don't have to teleport to find home...but, instead, i can teleport to share my home with those i love :-)

so, as my sugar high subsides, and i realize i have eaten about 4 bowls of lucky charms, i smile at this ridiculous box and feel almost like giggling as i daydream about my crazy obsession with the idea of teleporting.  and i smile even more as i realize i am no longer running to find my home outside of me within this dream...but, instead, have discovered my true home within :-)

who knew lucky charms could be so inspiring...?

 

creating the perfect saturday, one song at a time

what timing!

the helmet is just so perfect...i had to share.  rain pouring on my way home, soaked from the waste down because i was completely unprepared per my usual.

but it was a great ride ;-)

is it still winter? (from a bike commuter's perspective)

the other day, on my usual bike ride into work, i suddenly noticed something...something so ODD...so unexpected...and so pleasant!  I WAS NOT FREEZING MY ASS OFF!!!  wow...what a breath of fresh air!

but, in true chicago form, sunday was 81 degrees and yesterday was about 40 (high)...soo, here i am again, lamenting the cold and daydreaming about sunnier days.  

being a bike commuter, you stay pretty in tune with the weather.  even if you're like me, and decide to NOT look up the weather for the next day, you're going to KNOW the weather in no time whether you like it or not.  so, i live by the nature of...well....mother nature...and pretty much just do what i can to get through it.  sometimes i take it on like a challenge with excitement; yeah, you know that CRAZY downpour thunderstorm the other night, when the streets were flooding, and cars couldn't even drive down michigan avenue because it was like an f'ing RIVER?!  yeah, i was riding home during that ;-) ha!  i love it...i smile through those things like a kid eating candy.  it's such a high.

so, being that i am continually in touch with the lovely weather of chicago (mother nature, i am kissing your ass right now, please be nice to us!), i realized some funny things about how i notice weather changes.  

first realization: during the winter, i forget that my bike lock cord is actually FLEXIBLE.  it's not until that first day of defrosting that i find myself haphazardly swinging my lock around wondering why it is so damn FLOPPY!  oh right, it's not an ice cube right now.  

second realization: did my head miraculously get smaller overnight?  oh no, my helmet is just basically falling off because i am no longer wearing a huge ass HAT under my helmet (probably the hottest look any bike commuter can master)

third realization: my headphones suck...yeah, you know those pretty white ones you get with every single apple purchase?  well, somehow, as the weather warms, i start to constantly be picking them up and putting them back in my ears, mid ride...and why is that?  again, the hat trick.  without a hat, it becomes glaringly obvious that these ear phones do not stay in your ears FOR SHIT.  damn you apple.  you pull me in with the free stuff, and i just can't say no.

four: to my surprise, i am not actually "allergic to morning".  as the weather warms, the runny nose and watery eyes miraculously disappear.  wow, i totally forgot that the piercing freezing wind beating me all the way to work was actually the cause for that...!

and five: why is it becoming so hard to find things to ride in to work?  oh right, because i don't have to cover every square centimeter of my body in order to arrive safely without loosing any toes or fingers!  what a concept!  so, although i drop about 5 lbs on each ride, i suddenly begin struggling with the idea of skirts that are too short or too flowing or tshirts that flap in the wind and give that PERFECT shot of my oh so enormous breasts ;-)

so, the weather is indeed changing.  my bike has told me so.  and i have had some moments of pure bliss on my bike lately as I smile my way through the city without a bone chilling, clenched body, barely breathing mentality...but, instead, a fresh deep breath of wonderful lake air!  

BUT, i have not yet given in.  my helmet is still riding loose...because i KNOW i'll be adding that hat again at least one more time.  and my lobster claw gloves have not yet moved to the bottom of the pile.  i am PREPARED...my bike lock will yet again get stuck in a tight coil, my music will blare in my ears unaffected, my runny nose and watery eyes will return, and i will not yet give chicago a view of my sun deprived body while rushing past them in a blur...

mother nature loves to throw in that last snow...say mid april...and i'll be riding...no matter what

my birthday daily om

what timing.  this daily om (one of my favorite daily inspirational emails) came to me the day before my birthday. yet another BE QUIET message as a friendly reminder ;-)  it definitely has been heart warming!  and it has helped me so much that I wanted to share...

April 8, 2011
Underneath the Noise
Hearing the Whisper

Sometimes it is the softness of a whisper that is needed the most.

You may have noticed that if you want to speak to someone in a noisy, crowded room, the best thing to do is lean close and whisper. Yelling in an attempt to be louder than the room’s noise generally only hurts your throat and adds to the chaos. Similarly, that still, small voice within each of us does not try to compete with the mental chatter on the surface of our minds, nor does it attempt to overpower the volume of the raucous world outside. If we want to hear it, no matter what is going on around us or even inside us, we can always tune in to that soft voice underneath the surrounding noise.

It is generally true that the more insistent voices in our heads delivering messages that make us feel panicky or afraid are of questionable authority. They may be voices we internalized from childhood or from the culture, and as such they possess only half-truths. Their urgency stems from their disconnectedness from the center of our being, and their urgency is what catches our attention. The other voice that whispers reassurances that everything is fundamentally okay simply delivers its message with quiet confidence. Once we hear it, we know it speaks the truth. Generally, once we have heard what it has to say, a powerful sense of calm settles over our entire being, and the other voices and sounds, once so dominant, fade into the background, suddenly seeming small and far away.

We may find that our own communications in the world begin to be influenced by the quiet certainty of this voice. We may be less inclined to indulge in idle chatter as we become more interested in maintaining our connection to the whisper of truth that broadcasts its message like the sound of the wind shaking the leaves of a tree. As we align ourselves more with this quiet confidence, we become an extension of the whisper, penetrating the noise of the world and creating more peace, trust, and confidence.